yeay! for the Coquille public library.

(written Oct. '10) Yeay! for public libraries. They're not just a warm pleasant welcoming place for the homeless to spend the day. Though that they are. The Coquille Oregon branch was a haven for me while dealing with my mom's recent encarceration, aptly named by a prosecuting attorney, "The Case of a Nic Fit Gone Bad." I'd just narrowly escaped foreclosure on my home in August, and am still struggling to get my head back above water funded solely by unemployment benefits and rental income. Spending around $2000 in gas, car repair, and road expenses, in the last 2 months in support of my mom's crisis, has not helped my own cause. Well, maybe it has spiritually, psychologically or philosophically. Its hard to know. But financially, scholastically, professionally, definately not. The resources at the Coquille public library were my saving grace. A bathroom in the morning after spending nights sleeping in my ex's van or my mom's subaru station wagon. The internet for keeping in touch with friends and family worried about me and mom, helping me feel supported in my struggle, helping me feel sane, focused, loved, and legitimate though temporarily homeless.

Anyway, I picked up a book on display, "Alex & Me," by Irene M. Pepperberg. I obtained a temporary lending card to borrow it. Just finished it today. It was really entertaining and informative, about the author's experiences in scientific research with an African Grey Parrot into animal cognition. This is a subject dear to my heart. In exhibiting mysterious cognitive abilities, I believe animals including ourselves also exhibit our souls. Soul can be described as higher conciousness. Learning has to do with our souls' inate desire for self cultivation, evolution, improvement. Some would say it has to do with self preservation, survival. But what motivates our struggle to survive rather than just lay down and die? I believe it is our souls' desire to contribute to and express the beauty it percieves in living. When either it feels satisfied in it's accomplishment of that goal, no longer driven by any new urgency of a new expression of that goal, or completely frustrated and hopeless towards such goals, that is when a soul decides to let go the challenges of life and seek its final rest. Survival is about enabling future generations to continue the struggle to express itself with life. "Life" in this context can be defined as: the beauty and order of the universe, the unity and infinitismal order of matter and energy, or universal conciousness.

Anyway, it was a good read that I sped through. Here are some more I've enjoyed on the subject: The White Bone, Barbara Gowdy, is a fictional novel along the lines of Watership Down, ________, an autobiography of a personified african elephant named Mud. ______by _______, that I just loaned to FNG (sorry for incomprehensible notes to self, if I don't get back in here to fill in blanks, finish editing this entry,) the author's personal search and conversations with cutting edge biologists and animal behaviouralists on their recent work on animal intelligence and his ideas about soul. _______ that biology book I liked about bees and starfish, well written, thouroughly entertaining bite sized non-fiction vinettes about the facinating details of a few specific animals and how they've adapted to cope in their environments. The Man who Mistook his Wife for a Hat, Oliver Sachs, a similarly organized and thoroughly fascinating book about our human brains, clues to how they function as displayed by individuals who are missing parts. His genius combined with his compassion in his search for solutions to his patients' struggles is heartwarming and inspirational as well as comedic.